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February 28, 2007
First Love
I’m suffering from a broken heart. Not mine, my oldest son’s. He broke up with his girlfriend of seven months, though they have been friends for years. Actually, she ended the relationship. I can’t remember the last time I held my son while he cried. Perhaps when he was a toddler?
The pit in my stomach makes it hard for me to breathe. I want nothing more for my son than a life of love, good health, and happiness. But life is not static. Life is constantly changing. After all the tears, I hope he understands that one day we may experience nothing but love, good health and happiness, and the next day we don’t. Each day is a gift -- some come in prettier packages than others.
And I knew this day would come --the inevitable end of a first love. As I examine my own sadness, I realize that, as a mother, I don’t want my child to suffer. I naturally want him to go through life without bumps and bruises, physical or emotional.
I also realize that I personally learned the most from my mistakes and my losses, from pushing the boundaries and trying “one more time.”
My wish for my son today is: Feel the sadness. Understand the depth of your love. Emerge stronger – whenever you are ready.
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