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October 31, 2007
In Honor and In Memory
I’m making chili for dinner. (Don’t ask for the recipe. I’m from Texas. There is no recipe.) Why am I making chili you ask? Good question. Spencer, almost 18, won’t be here to eat it. He’s celebrating Halloween with his friends. Alexander, almost 13, won’t eat it. He’s vegetarian.
Truth is I’m making chili in honor of my 20th wedding anniversary tomorrow. Twenty years ago today, Scott and I held a chili party for our out-of-town guests. I made the chili a little too spicy (sorry Chuck), but the cornbread was warm and the beer cold.
As I look at the photographs taken that night, I smile and I cry. I smile in honor of all who gathered in our small condo (currently the Intergalactic Headquarters for Coplan and Company) and I cry for those who are now a memory.
In Honor
First I want to honor my parents-in-law Virginia and Robert Coplan for sharing their love. Eighty and eighty-one now and still going strong. This February they will celebrate 60 years of marriage. Scott and I want to be just like you when we grow up!
To my sister Mary: With our eight year age difference, you and I were not close growing up. But, through tragedy, our “sisterness” grew stronger and I consider you my best friend. Whether you like it or not. After all, I'm the bossy big sister.
To my sister-in-law Claudia: Thanks for becoming a friend-like-a-sister.
To my sister-in-law Wendie: Oh my gosh, you don’t look a day older than you did 20 years ago! Keep it up girl!
To my brother-in-law Arne: Thank you for your calming influence as a fellow “outlaw.”
To my cousin Myra: All these years and your personality is as bubbly and joyous as always. Glad you found another love to call you “sweetheart.”
To long-time good friends Chuck and Liz Knapp: Can’t believe I’ve known you for 40 years! Thanks for coming up to visit a couple of weeks ago. I enjoy sharing our lives and the lives of our children, the ups and the downs.
To my 30-year friends Julie Madonia and Jennifer Klein: What a treat to visit with both of you in the past year.
Julie: Thanks for spending Sunday with us in Beverly Hills last November. Brought back some good old memories of my younger years, dining on Rodeo Drive! Paris Hilton and her friends have nothing on the two of us! Or were we more like Lucy & Ethel?
Jennifer: What a stroke of luck for me when you “retired” to Spokane after 7 years of sailing the coast of Mexico. I feel so fortunate to visit you this past weekend in your new home town. And thanks for joining us at Alexander’s soccer game on that beautiful fall day in the Spokane Valley.
In Memory
Since the chili party:
Carl Iserman, my cousin Myra’s husband and official Coplan wedding photographer, died of lung cancer. A man of great integrity, loved by his family, friends and students. A man of class, culture, and humor.
Elizabeth Pohlmann died in 2001. Robert Pohlmann died in 1996. Mom and Dad, I enjoy looking at the photographs of your healthier days. Mom, that night at the chili party, you sat on the floor with the rest of us “young” folk, years before Parkinson’s took away that ability. Dad, I can’t find any pictures of you from that night. Is that because you were the party photographer? That’s so you. Oh, how I miss you two!
I think the tears just overwhelmed the smiles...at least for now.
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